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exile meets Mick Jones And since Colleen is preparing for the TopShop invasion by dealing with all things British, I thought I spew my particular brand of stupid, bigoted, anti British commentary over here for a change and show you New Yorkers what you missing, or not missing, here in the grand United Kingdom.

Somewhere along the way all those pimply bags of bones louis vuitton shoes burlesque known as "Punk Musicians" got knighted and became rich and fancy, and tonight they threw a party. English people do rich and fancy better than anyone else in the world; centuries of inbreeding and leisure time have resulted in legions of horse toothed heiresses with heaving bosoms, talking to dogs, driving beat up Fiats, and wearing 15 year old evening dresses with Wellington boots and motoring goggles. I like to picture a bunch of rich women with sagging jowls, swathed in Liberty prints, sitting around shooting clay pigeons until one of them says "Let shoot a girl, louis vuitton damier azur agenda hmm?" and they do exactly that. Anyway back to Mick. During that stage of life when my peers were into "Punk Music", I was sitting in the back of a van, pretending I liked Phish. Why? Because I liked weed more than I liked cheap beer and vodka. Consequently, I had no idea what Mick Jones looked like and when I saw him, I thought, hey, that fey old poofter is wearing a super cute outfit! Nice pocket square! Because I sort of expected him to be wearing a garbage bag or a vampire cape or something. But, it was him, and he exemplified what this party was all about: hyper eccentric British people getting their Sartorial on in a Big, Big Way. There were cute young art students doing the Oliver Twist thing: And sexy older guys doing the Elvis Costello thing: His little patches say love and hate! And he didn show his teeth which made him extra sexy and he Winked at me. This man truly exemplifies rich, fancy, and 100% English: got a piece of a coniferous tree jammed in his hatband, a brocade vest, a green satin rosette, and a silk cravat. He themed green for St. Pats, but I bet he looks this crazy and awesome 365 louis vuitton alma sticker days a year. Sadly he did not open his mouth to expose the GOLD STUD in between his TEETH for the photo. Srrriously. These people gild the holes in their fucked up teeth. These three ladies below would, I feel, be kind of Rockabilly in their parallel lives in the US. Here, in their real lives, they look like crazy old women who gone back in time to get their sexy on. Here a full length. Bitch is wearing tightass black and white checked pants (that takes some guts, yo) and shiny red shoes. The other ones are both wearing a fake fur from a 99p store. Also, there the hats. These ladies know what hats are all about and they both have Hat Face, big time. on our list is some lady who looks kind of French and is rocking her monk crop/pageboy to the extreme. She also smeared red paint all over her mouth and looks absolutely fabulous! Rock on sister: I think her scarf is a louis vuitton atlanta outlet car blanket! This lady was so gorgeous and old, and her spindly old lady legs were clad in sequined leggings. Her blazer was also besequined. I want her to take me to lunch. I bet she famous: it in the comments if you know who she is! Finally, we get to the best part: At a crazy art party, there always the trainwreck girl who might be a transvestite, but you know she left the house and was like, Holy Shit, this is the Best. Outfit. Ever. She was very sweet and is an art student. 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